My ADHD Medication Journey
Mental health professionals who specialise in diagnosing ADHD often overlook the most challenging symptom of ADHD; the emotional world of their patients.
The root of the ADHD difficulty is the inability to manage and successfully control emotions. Anger management issues, overreacting without thinking things through, being super-sensitive to criticism, overwhelming negative thought patterns, depression, anxiety, overwhelm shutdown, crippling fear and worry are just some of the symptoms of the ADHD emotional dysfunction.
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Difficulties in regulating intense positive emotions lie on the opposite side of the scale.
These emotional difficulties have a far greater impact than the attention difficulties. Emotional self-regulation affects every part of a person’s life. You can forgive your friend for arriving late, or spacing out for a few minutes during a conversation. It will be much harder to forgive your friend for lashing out at you. Driving and criminal offences will not be overlooked due to ADHD either. Tragically, a very high proportion of people in prison have ADHD.
When a client mentions that they may have ADHD, I am more concerned with their levels of emotional self-regulation than their difficulty focusing.
ADHD treatment needs to focus primarily on becoming self-aware and learning how to recognise and control irregular and often overwhelming and stormy emotions.
Here are the top 3 difficulties in ADHD women.
- Poor (or non-existent) working memory
- High emotional volatility
- Anxiety/non-stop thoughts that destroy one’s peace of mind
MY JOURNEY ON THE ADHD MEDS
I only received a formal ADHD diagnosis in November 2019. An ADHD professional. advised me that I should get an ADHD assessment since he claimed that I clearly showed the classical signs of ADHD. I knew that I had an “ADHD Personality” however I still didn’t really believe that I had ADHD. I decided to get assessed because I wanted to understand what my ADHD clients went through during their ADHD Assessments. I got diagnosed with “A severe case of ADHD.” I decided to try medication so that I could understand my clients. I was still convinced that I did not really have ADHD, and the meds wouldn’t work right? I was prescribed Concerta.
The first week I took one 18mg tablet. You know what they say, if the ADHD meds works then you have ADHD without a doubt. If they don’t work, then you probably don’t have ADHD. The first week the meds had no effect. The second week I was very eager to see if there was a difference when taking 2 tables (36mg)
I was disappointed that I felt no difference in the first week. Maybe I didn’t have ADHD after all…
During week 2 I took 2 tablets for 3 days then I forgot to take the dose for two days. On the 5th day I left the house early for an appointment, I was aware of a distinctly nervous feeling and I was aware that I was driving too fast. I realised I hadn’t felt like this in a while. I realised that the meds must be working after all… OK, I must have ADHD…
I got back at 10am and took 2 tablets. Since I hadn’t taken them for 2 days, I felt a bit “off.” I pushed through. Around 2pm I noticed that I felt calmer.
This was on Friday. I am Jewish and we observe the Sabbath. Sabbath comes in at sundown. In the winter this is really early around 3.30pm.
After I had lit the Sabbath candles, I sat down with my 7-year-old son to play with him. This is our weekly ritual. Every week I tell him that this is the best time of the week for me! I tell him that I just love to play with him and can’t wait for this time. I don’t tell him that it is the hardest time of the week…This week I sat down and played a game with my 7-year-old son for 45 minutes without getting up once.
I listened to a detailed account from my teenage daughter for 20 minutes…with patience and focus. Her story was actually interesting for the first time ever.
Suddenly everything is coming into focus. I feel like my glasses prescription has been fixed and I didn’t even know it was faulty… I am not looking out at the world in a fog anymore.
The most amazing change is, that food is no longer “talking to me” and “pulling me”
For the last 3 years I’ve had a diet coach attend my home for weekly sessions. I am 5 foot 5 inches, and a regular size 14. Since forever, and especially the last 5 years I have felt that something was “off.” It was so very hard to eat a balanced diet and maintain self-control.
Since starting on the meds, my level of feeling in control regarding food has turned around 360 degrees.
I am far less tempted to take a quick nibble or bite. This is even when the meds where off. Pre-meds, I would have had a mighty hard daily battle with myself not to eat any. I am so delighted that one of the side effects of taking ADHD meds is reduced appetite! The medication helps to control the unmanaged impulsivity, one of the deficits of ADHD.
There was a minor extended family crisis on Friday afternoon. I handled it calmly. Later that evening, I discussed this incident with my daughter and my husband. Listening to myself, I couldn’t believe that I was able to keep my voice at a calm level, and calmly explain myself… This had NEVER happened before… No hysterical histrionics, no drama queen… Just clear, calm and solution oriented. My thoughts were focused and I could work through the problem. No more jumbled tangled mess; just one thought at a time.
I have been on ADHD meds for over 2 years. I still feel an intense feeling of relief every single day, when I feel the meds starting to kick in.
TO TAKE ADHD MEDS OR NOT TO TAKE MEDS?
Many people are wary about getting an ADHD diagnosis or label. It doesn’t matter what label you have. The label doesn’t define who you are. It defines your symptoms. If the ADHD meds works, then who cares what label you have. The most important thing is that you can have a better quality of life. You only have one life, why should your life be harder just because you have ADHD?
Parents tell me that they are not giving their child ADHD medication. Please consider the following fact. If your child has type 1 diabetes, this means that the body doesn’t produce the hormone insulin. Without that, the body can’t properly get the energy and fuel it needs from glucose. Your child needs a daily insulin injection. Preventing this treatment is cruel and life threatening.
If your child has ADHD, their brain has a deficiency in dopamine and norepinephrine. This means that ADHD is a physical condition, just like type 1 diabetes. Administering the ADHD meds has been found to increase the dopamine levels in the brain and improve the attention in those with ADHD.
ADHD is a physical condition just like type 1 diabetes. The meds work. If your child has ADHD, you owe it to your child to let them try it out. If you have ADHD, you owe it to yourself to get assessed and try the meds. See the difference that it can make in your life. If one type of medication doesn’t work, don’t give up. Just try another one until you experience change. You need to persevere.
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SUCCESSFUL ADHD MANAGEMENT IS PILLS AND SKILLS
ADHD meds only support between 30-50% of the ADHD deficits. The rest is life skills learned through ADHD coaching, which gives you the skills that your ADHD brain is lacking.
The ADHD meds help manage mood and focus, that is all. They don’t improve the level of your working memory, or your organisation, time management, or decision-making. These needs to be learned through a specialist ADHD coach.
ADHD symptoms, especially in women, often worsen as women approach the peri-menopause stage.
I have achieved the impossible without meds, working mightily hard to create and stick to routines and ADHD friendly changes in my life and my family, and helping countless clients to manage their ADHD successfully. If I would relive my life, I would have taken the meds from age 5! Life is thought. Why should your life be more challenging than it already is?
MANAGING ANXIETY
Now I understand why super high anxiety wasn’t shifting, no matter how many therapy sessions I attended, and how many hours of mindfulness exercises I carried out. I now know that my anxiety was caused/worsened through my unmanaged ADHD those chemicals in the brain that were unbalanced. My intense nature, my very high and very low moods are common among those with ADHD, especially women.
Being medicated for my ADHD has helped me work through problems that crop up in a calm manner.
I own my impulsivity, that inner drive that pushes me to do things that neurotypical people would think twice before doing… This is to my advantage. If I can help more women with ADHD unlock their potential, it will all be worthwhile.
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WHAT DO YOU TACKLE FIRST, THE PILLS OR THE SKILLS?
Most of my clients don’t have an ADHD diagnosis and they are making huge strides. If you think that you or your child may have ADHD, the first step is to get an ADHD assessment. Please bear in mind that every situation is unique. You will encounter many paths that lead to the top of the mountain. It doesn’t matter which path you choose. Just long stay on that path until you reach the summit. In an ideal world getting your ADHD diagnosis and meds should come first before you learn the skills. When your brain is supported, it is so much easier to implement the ADHD tools that your ADHD coach will teach you.
If you prefer to get your ADHD diagnosis before starting ADHD coaching, this may just be a trap. It can take months to get an appointment, and even longer until your ADHD is well medicated. The only time you have is now. Use it wisely.
Dr. Raun Melmed runs the Melmed Centre in the USA. He specialises in ADHD and ASD. Dr. Melmed issued a very strong statement that if doctors are prescribing ADHD medications without also prescribing other supports such as coaching, they are using the medications off-label, and illegally, because the pharmaceutical companies now clearly state that the medications alone are not enough. He sees the clinics of the future including not just diagnosticians, but care-coordinators, professional organisers, and ADHD coaches. (ACO Conference 2014).